November

Just because it's been awhile (it's always 'been a while'), we've had a lovely start to the month of November.

On Tuesday, the 2nd, Scott and I, along with Sarah and Ian, Simon and Maria, and Kate and Faisal, headed off for the Glenmorangie House (pronounced 'glen-MOR-angie', like 'orangey') for three days. There we got to take a free (everything was free actually) cruise on Loch Ness, go clay pigeon shooting (I hit three out of ten in the air!), and take a tour of the distillery, followed by a whisky tasting.






The hotel - what a disservice calling it a 'hotel', it really is a house - was amazing. Our room, Morayshire, was massive, with a super-king size bed and a large, deep bath... ah, bliss. It overlooked the Avenue of Trees and further down, the water.




Each night (after pre-dinner drinks and canapes, of course), we were served a five-course meal, by one of the top chefs in Scotland. I couldn't pronounce even half of what was on the menus, but I loved nearly all of it. I especially loved how they served nearly half the courses with some sort of Glenmorangie cooked or poured in. Each morning we were served a four-course breakfast; I mean, I didn't know breakfast could HAVE courses. And for our 'light lunch' on the second day, we had sandwiches, butternut squash soup and salad. All this, of course, helped soak up all the whisky we drank.

We also had time to go take a walk by the seaside. It was beautiful. After our morning shoot, we wandered along rocks and sand of the shore and collected interesting shells and stones. Shells far more interesting than what you'd see at Lunderston Bay. And get this - we even saw a dead minke whale washed ashore. We thought it was a seal, at first, as it was already torn apart by the vultures and was missing a head, but it was in fact a whale. With a dead squid in its stomach. It was FASCINATING. Could only have been there a couple of days. I was furious my camera batteries had died halfway through clay pigeon shooting, meaning I couldn't get a photo.

It was such a lovely break. It was even nicer spending it with friends. I have such a greater appreciation of whisky now, and can even say I understand why the older the malt, the better. I used to like Glenmorangie Original, but now that I've tasted its 18 year old, its Qunita Ruban and its Nectar D'Or... oh yum.

But that's not all. We came back on Thursday night and collected the kids. Friday we just tried to have a relatively chilled day, and then Saturday we took them to Battery Park for the Myths & Legends festival, where they got to listen to storytelling and get their faces painted. Then that night we went back to see the fireworks and the mythological phoenix rise from the ashes. It was fun. I love fireworks and this year they did not disappoint.

So that's November so far. We've got a few other things planned, so it ought to be a fun month. The opening night for Panto is at the end of the month, so I've got lots of work to do, getting ready for it. And two kids' birthday parties, Cameron and Caspar. And probably some other stuff. Oh, yeah, like Thanksgiving! It's going to be a busy, busy month. But methinks it'll be grand.

Well, I SHOULD Be Cleaning...

But it's been a while since I blogged. I don't know how other mommy bloggers do it. I suppose if it's a priority to blog, you make time. My priorities these days, I'm afraid, do not include blogging.

They include things like *being cast two more shows totalling three in all at the moment* and trying to find a dry day to play tennis in.

(That's my wee update ^ there. I am going to be Shelby in Steel Magnolias and the Voice in You Made Me!)

It's not to say I don't think about blogging. I actually think all day long 'Oh, that would be a good blog topic.' Like Monday I was in Tesco and saw they'd put out all their Halloween costumes, and I thought about blogging about Halloween. Problem is, I don't have much of an opinion on the subject, and not bothered enough to form one.

(For the time being, I don't have a huge problem with it on the surface, and while I don't really want my little children going as scary things, I do love fancy dress [dressing up], and I have no problem with candy either!)

Or I think about blogging updates, because something is always happening around here, but updates are SO boring, and they insult the writer in me. I started a blog to share interesting thoughts and stories with the world, not to tell them about my macaroni and cheese incident. I save that for Facebook.

Or about my new HTC Desire mobile phone. (Heh, I got a new phone and I love it! But I am not going to blog about it... even if I just did. Sucka!)

No, unfortunately, my little brain is overcrowded as it is. But I don't want to stop blogging. I wish I still had enough readers to do some kind of wide plea for blog topics. I used to have so many readers! I miss you guys.

Maybe if I had some good blog topics. Maybe it's time to hit Facebook again!

I can't believe I got sucked into Facebook. It's shocking and humiliating.

Okay, back to tidying and entertaining my kids (by sticking on Peppa Pig).

Dancing Is Not a Crime

What a fantastic opening night! Last night was brilliant. I had so much fun with the show, and only made one tiny mistake in one of the dances. :D

Scott, my dad and Fifi came last night. Fifi LOVED it. Scott said she was mouthing along to all the words, until 'Holding Out for a Hero' started, at which point she BELTED it out. People three rows away were looking at her! By intermission, she was rolling her head and trying desperately to stay awake. (Ice cream at intermission helped, I believe.) She managed to stay awake until curtain call, at which point she passed out.

Oh, and she brought me flowers! How sweet is that. Thanks, Scott and Fifi.

I'll need to think to bring my camera tonight and get some photos backstage. But if you want to see photos of the performance, Inverclyde Now took some cracking ones.

My throat is still killing me. I woke this morning with no voice. Luckily hot tea and Manuka honey have helped bring it back. But I'm still trying not to talk much today to save it. Not only do I need to save my voice for the next two performances, but I have two auditions in just over a week for other shows and at the same time, my classes start, which of course, are singing classes. I really need a voice for that too. REALLY need it for that. How bad would that be if my first class was delivered with no singing voice?

Anyway, I'm having so much fun. Last night, a big group of people from the cast went out to a club, but I'm so glad I went home. Mostly because it was better for my voice going home and getting a good rest. But also I really enjoyed talking to Scott about the show. He really enjoyed it - and he's not a musical theatre person. It was fun talking to him about all his thoughts on the show and to hear him say he could pick out my voice from the chorus - and I was on key!

My dad seemed to enjoy the show too. Though (and I have to agree with him) he didn't think much of the Southern USA accents!!

So, two more performances. I'm incredibly excited. We're having lunch with others from the cast this afternoon, but I need to make sure I have time to make my chocolate no-bake cookies... Me and another cast member, Lee, are having a baking war. First night I brought chocolate chip cookies, but she outdid me last night with her brownies. I'm hoping I can regain some ground with my no-bake cookies, but honestly, I think her brownies have already won the war.

Everybody cut FOOTLOOSE!

Tonight is Opening Night of Footloose! I can't believe it! I'm feeling very excited about it, but also a little sad. If the show is tonight, then by Saturday night, the show will be done for good, and that's a bit sad. I've enjoyed meeting all the people in the show and seeing them regularly and making some friends. I'll feel a bit deflated when it's all over.

I'll feel a lot less stressed too but deflated all the same.

It's been a really fun experience for me. I thought after high school I'd never return to acting. As a stroppy teenager, I let too many things upset me and turn me off from the theatre world. But now, as a wiser (heh) older person, I realise that some of those things (the politics, the falseness of some, the arrogance of others) are just part of life in general and are not unique to the stage. As long as you keep yourself right and in amongst the right people (and at least play the game when you're with the wrong ones), as I've learned to do in all areas of my life, all this theatre stuff can really be a huge blast.

So, negativity aside (geez), I am SO EXCITED about the show tonight. It's typical that on Opening Night I'd wake up with a sore throat and the sneezes. But I'm drinking hot herbal tea with Manuka honey around the clock and intend to feel perfectly fine by tonight. I had some hot soup there too and that seemed to soothe my throat quite a bit.

Tonight is the night that Scott, my dad and Fifi come see the show. Fifi is ridiculously excited. She woke up this morning saying, 'Is today Footloose??' Then proceeded to prance around the house singing, 'Footloose, footloose!' while the rest of us tried to bury our heads in our pillows and go back to sleep.

In the car on the way to nursery, she asked if she could wear a crown to the show tonight. And she wants to dress '80's'. Apparently in her mind, crowns are totally 80's.

So it's gonna be a good day. I'm exhausted already, but really looking forward to tonight. I'm totally buzzing.

Though admittedly, that might be just a side effect of the lack of sleep, runny nose, and the four cups of honeyed tea I've had already this morning.

Catch-Up Time

A Post For Relatives and Friends Residing Not Here

So I do not have anything wise, witty or wonderful to report, but I figured since a lot is going on, I'd better fill in those of you who do not see me but still give a rat's behind what I do.

And because I love bullet points, I present you with a bulleted list. Ka-POW!

* I have been very busy these past weeks with shows. Yes, shows, plural. My Sundays and Thursdays have been dedicated to rehearsals for Footloose, which opens in two weeks today! (Aughhh!) Mondays are now rehearsals for the Christmas pantomime (that link is for you Americans who are like, "What? Mime? Lori loves mime! Didn’t she win 2nd place at State for mime? Oh, not that kind of pantomime... Sigh.") (And I love how seamlessly I boasted my past high school victories as if they still matter to anyone ten years later. Ka-POW!) And then I'm also trying to prepare for auditions for Steel Magnolias which will be in less than four weeks. I am most nervous about that, because I want a part so bad I can taste it! (Slight quoting of Steel Magnolias going on there. Anyone know which part I'm referring to?) So busy, busy, busy with my new theatre life. Long live the stage and all that.

* As if one overly time-consuming new interest weren't enough, I've also decided that I love tennis. (Do I have an awesome husband or what? While I’m out gallivanting, he’s stuck in with the kids. But hey, as long as he is happy with his World of Warcraft and Eve Online, I think I’m in the clear for gallivanting.) I mentioned this previously, I know, but it's imperative that I let you know that I have become a genuine tennis fanatic. I have become a paid member at the tennis club down the street, and since then, have visited the courts nearly every day. I've not yet gotten to go with anyone my own age with whom I can actually play a game, so I've just been practising my serve over and over while the kids play with the leaves and the sticks. They do a bit of tennis playing themselves - well, Fifi does, Lolly just chews on her racquet - but they get bored easily so we only go for about half an hour to an hour each day. My serve is getting marginally better, meaning that about 1% of the time I serve it into the correct service box, so even going with the kids is proving to be useful. I do have weekly matches arranged now with my friend Becky, so soon, once that gets going, I’ll have some time to really get playing.

And I also now own three racquets. I might start braiding my hair like Venus Williams.

* Hair. Yes, on the subject of hair, I hate my hair. I knew when I cut it lesbian short that I would have to go through this awful growing-it-out period, but I kinda saw that as something in the distant future that wasn't worth worrying about at the time. Well, the distant future is now the present so blah, I've got icky hair. My last hair cut was abysmal, and I've held out as long as possible, but I can no longer stand the look of myself when I pass by windows and mirrors. So tomorrow, it's getting chopped. Still keeping the length at the top but getting all the underneath stuff shortened into something like this. I wish my dear best Amanda were here to do it for me. She’s a new stylist now, you see. I’m very proud of her.

* And now, to bring it full circle, a bit prematurely perhaps, I'm worried cutting my hair will decrease my chances of getting the part I want in Steel Magnolias. However, my hair looking like it does now will do me no favours either, so I guess it's every man for himself. (Another half SM quote that really didn’t make any sense right there.)

* I say that bringing it full circle there is a bit premature, because I'm not done! In other catch-up news, I've got a new job! I will be working 8 hours a week at Blockbuster. Ka-POW! I will make money and save money at the same time; make money by having a new job and save it by not having to rent DVDs anymore. Free DVD rentals every week, hurray! I'll be working evening and weekend shifts, so that I'll still get to spend the day with my lovely munchkins and still run my TinyTalk classes.

* Speaking of TinyTalk, this wasn't one of my original bullet points, but I'll throw it in. TinyTalk is going much better for me nowadays. I'd hate to get too optimistic in case it all goes to pot next term, but the Summer term and now the Autumn term classes have been nearly full. My Greenock Autumn class is nearly full and my Kilmacolm one is getting more interest and more people signing up every day. So I'm feeling pretty chuffed about that! Profit from that might be enough to feed my new tennis habit! Oh and of course benefit the rest of the family in some way... I might pay a phone bill with it or buy Scott a tennis membership, heh.

* All right, a couple more things, and that is all. I am still on a diet, though not a strict one, and feeling very positive about it. Because I'm not trying to crash diet or go overboard with a strict diet, I feel this is going to be very sustainable. It might take a bit longer to see results, but I'm convinced that the way I'm doing it is the right way and the pounds will actually stay off, because I'm trying to change my entire concept of eating and snacking into something that is much healthier and much more satisfying, rather than something that will just make me quickly lose weight. I am already seeing a difference. Saying no to cakes and sweets is actually easier than I thought, because I've realised the satisfaction I get from self-control is actually much better than the momentary pleasure of giving in. And when I do give in, it never feels worth it after the cake is gone. I've also realised that if I don't eat a good, nutritious breakfast, I am starving by mid-morning, whereas when I eat something healthy and filling for breakfast, I'm not even tempted to snack until lunch time. Who knew?

* And last, I'm getting very excited about my Dad's visit in a week. Oh my goodness, I can't believe it's only a week away. I really need to get my car hoovered out. Don't want him to know what kind of squalor we usually live in. Anyway, I am really looking forward to having him here. I’m just sorry I’ll be so busy with the play that week. That was something that didn’t occur to me when I convinced him to come in time to see the show. I just hope we can make good use of our time together before the show week and the daytimes of the show week.

Then a month after that, my mom comes to visit, and a few days after that is our trip to the Glenmorangie House in Tain! Heck, then a month and a half after that is Lolly and Scott's birthdays and then Christmas! What the...! Already planning both kids’ birthday parties, because I’m a supermom like that. Haha.

And there you have it. A run-down of what's been going on around here. And now, just lovely. Our internet connection is down. I guess this shall be posted at a later point in time. Scott and his WoW guild are not amused as this is a raid night. He’s a night elf druid (feral at the moment!) and was meant to be killing Halion tonight. Isn’t he sexy?

Pregnancy Loss Week 2010

I'm wiping huge tears off my cheeks as I post this.





This week is Pregnancy Loss Week. I have never lost a pregnancy, thank God, but people very close to me have, and one very close person in particular. I don't think I quite understood just how deep the pain runs, but reading some of these blogs have opened my eyes to the pain one feels after losing a baby.

I have nothing more I can say on the subject, and I wouldn't even want to try. I just want to draw a bit more awareness to the subject, especially for those of us who have known someone who lost a pregnancy but haven't known how to respond or what to feel, so we can all start to understand one another better in the love of mutual motherhood.

DECISIONS!

Funniest thing this morning.

I was still in bed (out late last night at midnight swim in outdoor pool then Spinnaker after!), but Fifi was up having breakfast. She came and asked me if she could have a plum, and I said yes, but she'd need to get it herself (I'm such a good mother) so she went and got her wee stool and took it to the fridge to get her plum. I started to go back to sleep, when I heard a thump, a scream and Fifi cry out in utter desperation,

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DOOOOOO!"

Scott, just out of the shower, ran through to see what happened, and I jumped out of bed. Fifi was standing on her stool, plum in one hand, and clutching herself with the other.

"I NEED TO GO PEEPEE BUT I NEED TO EAT MY PLUUUUUM?!"

Scott and I burst out laughing. "Give me your plum and you go peepee first," he told her. She seemed genuinely relieved that there was now a plan of action for her to follow as she raced for the toilet, her plum safely waiting for her in her daddy's hands.

The difficult decisions children must make!

New Blog Title

On a perfect lazy day
We lie on our backs and stare at the sky
And I make you bet on which cloud
You think'll reach the horizon first.

I know you know I'm just playing for time
'Cos I like the way you pay attention.
And even when your eyes get kinda scary,
I'm pretty sure I think they're pretty still.

If you don't cut your hair
I promise not to grow mine.
I'll be a gentleman
You'll take it as a good sign.
I'll generally annoy the hell out of you.

If I slur my words
It's because
I'm not sure
If I can say this.

I love you.

If you don't cut your hair
I promise not to grow mine.
I'll be your gentleman
You'll take it as a good sign.
I'll generally annoy the hell out of you.

Doo doo do doo, doo doo do doo, doo do doo.

-my song by Scott McFarlane

Diet Day Four

So, I've made it through day 4 of my diet, and I'm feeling pretty darn proud of myself. I went to Mother & Toddlers today, and there were TONS of yum-yums and cookies, and I didn't have even one! Just a cup of tea!

I've been eating my one bowl of muesli for breakfast (today I had a banana too), and my soup for dinner. Tonight's soup was kinda bland and boring, but I still ate it. It was full of veggies, just not full of flavour. I had a sandwich for lunch (bread is no good, but in moderation...) and all I had for a snack through the day was a couple of strawberries!

Want to know how I'm getting through my day without eating junk?

There is some cake left over from my TinyTalk party in a cake tin, and each time I pass by it, I think, "If I'm good ALL DAY, I can treat myself with ONE SMALL SLICE tonight." And so I just finished my one small slice of reward, and you know what?

I wasn't that bothered!

So maybe tomorrow I'll look at the cake and think, "Eh, just bin the rest."

Maybe.

Anyway, as for the exercise part, last night I went to play rounders in the park with some friends, but since only one other person showed up, we went to play tennis instead. I have decided tennis is my new favourite sport. I have a lot of sports that I enjoy, but I'm not good at playing any of them. I'm not GREAT at tennis either, but it was actually a sport I didn't totally suck at! Making me feel very motivated to try again and get better. I'm like that - if I can't take to something right away, I can't be bothered learning it. Like guitar. I took one lesson, knew it wasn't gonna come easy for me and quit.

But not tennis.

So I'm gonna look into playing more often. Maybe even look into a membership at a club. Maybe even look into lessons for Fifi (so I have an excuse to play more).

Only thing is, the other problem with me is I often fall for things hard, and then my excitement for it blows over, and I give up. So before I get TOO wrapped up in it, I need to play a bit more to make sure it's gonna stick. Scott enjoys tennis too, so he's up for playing with me. If we can get some kind of routine down (and a babysitter to match - Hi Granny and Grampa!!), I think that would make it stick better.

So to bring this all together, if I keep up my diet (and I think I might just go ahead and bin that cake, it wasn't all that worth it) and I keep up a bit of sporty exercise, I MIGHT just lose that wee bit of weight I'm hoping to lose. I'd love to feel fit and healthy again and look kinda good in the process.

So here we go Day Five!

New Healthy Kick....

I've been feeling rather obsessed about my weight lately. Not that I'm overweight, (and my friend Kieran didn't REALLY say we were fat), but I would rather like to feel a bit slimmer and more toned. I started trying to motivate myself by sticking skinny pictures of me on the kitchen cabinets to deter me from eating snacky junk, but all it did was depress me.

Then we went to a pole dancing class, and the photos from the event made me realise two things...



One, I need a tan.

Two, I need to lose the thunder thighs.

Perhaps THAT picture on my cabinets would do the trick.

So I made a plan. Not too regimented, as that would never work, but I took my motivated self to the grocery store and filled my trolley with carrots, peppers, broccoli, parsnips, tomatoes, asparagus, baby corn and various fruit. I also added organic, free range chicken and eggs, smoked mackerel and muesli. Yeah, muesli.

And a pair of welly boots for Lolly, but that was separate.

I plan to make soups this week with loads of veggies for dinner (and grilled chicken for Scott to add to the side). Lunches will be fairly normal things we usually eat, but I'll replace some of the less healthy meats with the mackerel, and our snacks will be smoothies and steamed veggies. Fifi even said she would eat the baby corn. We'll see.

So here's the thing. I hoped it would come out cheaper, even going for the organic, free range chicken products. But it didn't. Damn it.

I used to feel very strongly about the ethics of the foods we eat, but when you are on a tight budget, that kinda thing goes out the door. But after reading an article recently about all the antibiotics, water, and junk they pump into the chickens to make them sellable, I had a change of heart. I would buy the good stuff not because it's 'the good stuff' but because it's the normal stuff, not the sub-par stuff. And I would hope God would somehow reward me for my ethical behaviour by not making it that much more expensive.

Anyway, we'll see how long it lasts. I had a bowl of muesli for breakfast, and I even measured out an exact portion with my kitchen scales. (THAT won't last.) And it was a reasonable sized portion, much to my surprise. And because I bought one with loads of fruit in it, it was palatable. Unfortunately, that means loads of sugar (and not the good kind - dried fruit is packed with perserving sugars), but hey, Rome wasn't built in a day. I need to ease into the taste of 'healthy' stuff.

So, we'll see how it goes. I will also make more effort to get out and exercise more than just twice a week at Footloose rehearsals. I live in town, I could always take up running and thrive on the car horns and pervy whistles I might get to motivate me further.

And I've started using fake tanner.